The gurgles of the baby, that innocent smile, the little hand that beckons and the tongue that rolls out a sound , ‘Mumma’ …’papa’. Yes! Parenthood is a delightful journey. It is full of experiences that urge us to nurture and cherish the little bundle of joy in our arms. It begins with a small helpless being who grows up to crawl, walk, and talk.
Parenting is like a jig saw puzzle full of challenges and moments of delight as well as fears and phobias. From conception to infancy, from puberty and adolescence to adulthood. Children may grow up from fledglings to independent birds but parents who are born with their child still hold on to little fingers and baby steps.
As challenges increase with changing times; parents grow protective and fearful. To hold on or to let go…to trust or to overwhelm, to give roots or wings….dreams are big and fears bigger…is there a tool to harmonize the conflict?
Meditation is the tool that helps to harmonize the modern times with ancient wisdom and values so that roots and wings go together. As parents meditate to add color, beauty and life to parenthood, as well as erase frowns and creases from your worried crown. Let’s see how challenges of different phases are overcome by meditating parents.
– Meditation grooms the mind to be positive. As a result peace reigns and we are able to focus on the growing needs of the child.
– Meditation helps us to resolve our own conflicts and mindsets. Our thought quality improves like never before. Meditators are so much in harmony that they think good and goodness manifests in their lives. Bad times look like challenges and a meditative state gives great solutions.
– Meditation keeps the mind in tune with changing time and this is the greatest challenge with our children. Generation gap is not a myth but with meditation we stay tuned to our children by listening to their point of view, being objective and striving together by accepting disagreements and working amicably on areas of agreement. There is no deadlock.
– Meditating parents contribute in building a positive environment.The moment the young adults step into our shoes, we know that we need to let them be. We realize that they are individuals in their own right. All these aspects come smoothly through meditation otherwise we all know the story of brick bats and the blame game.
Let us see how meditation can help each one of you through all phases of parenting.
# 1 The New Born
The new born baby either sleeps or cries to communicate. Here as parents we need to have intuitive skills that comes naturally with meditation. Meditation helps you to be doubly patient and harness your inner voice. Yes! Ones intuitive skill helps to understand the little baby. Our response to a baby’s wails in the middle of the night sets us apart from other parents.
A parent who meditates is fresh and calmly lifts up the baby and soothes his woes. From hunger to tummy ache or just the wet nappy…every thing is taken care of. The vibration that reaches the baby reassures and soothes. The baby sleeps again. Perfect two way communication where words were not heard but vibes were felt.
At the same time meditation gives deep rest to the parents to enable them to stay fresh, happy and peaceful all day and at night too. Meditation keeps stress at bay and manages tiredness with ease. As a result even working parents find the energy levels to play and charm the little one later in the day.
#2 Crawling Jets
Toddlers can justly be called crawling jets. Thanks to the Almighty that they cannot fly! Yes! We are talking about toddlers who find their way into bathrooms, balconies, hiding places in or around the house. They have a high energy quotient and with a war cry they are at their mischievous best. Like a bull they just, ‘want it’, ‘take it’ or else ‘grab it.’ They want to do it all by themselves. Gosh! They are like little rockets taking off just like that and making holes in your sanity. They throw tantrums and can be stubborn up to the hilt.
Ah! But meditation helps parents by giving them extra energy, patience and a happy and calm persona. They have the patience to understand the cry to be independent and also have the ability to distract the child with laughter or a noise to charm the child away from the tantrum. A friend would whisper sweet nothings into his 9 month old toddler who would stop wailing and smile. Like this he was weaned away from an otherwise progressive problem of putting up a tantrum every now and then.
#3 Pre-teens – the lovely pubescent
Ah! This age group is still small but wish to be treated with dignity. We hurt them the moment we tell them , ‘don’t tell lies’, ‘behave yourself’, or ‘just listen to me.’ Actually this is the time when they want listeners and friends in their parents. Meditation helps at this stage to shed the authoritative robe and step into their shoes to see where it pinches and when it soothes. Meditation makes parents sensitive as well as intuitive to sequence helpful ways i.e. spot changes, understand them and then handle them. This is the time that meditation helps coordinate a favorable environment and balances the change by sticking to roots but allowing to spread wings.
Just 20 minutes of meditation can change your perspective towards your child. This is the time when one can double the harmony by introducing spirituality and meditation to children through courses like Art Excel and YES programs that balance out children and help them to step into this world with knowledge, awareness and confidence. Meditation gives your child the skills to deal with peer pressure with his or her confidence, harness creative skills, be fearless while expressing and gaining focus and the ability to concentrate. What more can a parent ask for?
#4 Young Adults
At this stage our young ones are being prepared to grow up into adults. Hormone play begins as nature prepares them for their flight into the sky. This is the most taxing period for parents and utterly crucial for the young adults. This is the time when they want to be treated like adults but parents hold on tight signaling the opposite.
Meditation helps here with the law of harmony. It helps them to understand that its time to give responsibilities to make them feel like adults. Shruti recalls how after some fire works with her teenage son she sat down to meditate only to realize that he just wanted to be recognized as a ‘sort of grown up’ who could manage school responsibilities along with exams. She also points out that when she opened her eyes her son had cooled off and so had she. After exchanging a smile that said it all she just left the matter. Her son not only faired well in studies but also won the elections he was canvassing for. Meditation helps us to turn inward to find answers and solutions. From quarreling geese to thick pals…the journey is smooth if parents meditate. Here again if adolescents also meditate then the journey is one of blossoming to become bigger and better.
My daughter also meditates with me. Meditating together gives us a silent platform to bond so beautifully. Now we exchange roles time and again. We are there for each other like strong pillars of strength. Just 20 minutes help you to strengthen yourself, energize the environment and those around. Meditating parents know the strength of meditation and are able to guide their children to as they grow up. If meditation makes parents approachable and understanding then it makes children sensitive, focused and balanced. It’s a win win situation for all.